Ep 3: Intimacy After Baby
In this episode, my husband James Mattingley & I are interviewed by the wonderful Aimee Batuski of Desire on Fire, on how our marriage has changed since becoming parents. Aimee helps us dig into all the shifts we’ve gone through, and how we’ve navigated them together as a couple.
We knew our lives would change after we got married, started our businesses, and had a baby, but it was impossible to fully prepare for the ups and downs that would occur through all of these major life events. Here we share how we’ve adapted to new needs, expectations, and roles as parents.
Today, we’re bringing our tools and advice to you so that you can learn from our mistakes and successes and start integrating these practices into your own relationship to start having the intimacy you crave.
If this episode moves you, please let me know by reaching out by email, Instagram DM, or leaving a review to let us know your thoughts!
If you’re curious about our offerings, visit us at www.integratedintimacy.co.
Time Stamps:
(4:13 - 5:52) Our history as a couple so far
(6:16 - 9:25) Reflecting on our marriage and early parenthood. Describing the magnified feelings and emotional bubbles we experienced
(9:26 - 12:20) Megan feeling needy after giving birth, and learning to feel worthy of that extra love and care
(12:22 - 13:39) James’s perspective on being needed more while receiving less, and what has changed for him in becoming a father
(13:41 - 19:26) How we’ve navigated the inevitably uneven roles in new parenthood without becoming resentful of each other (well, not too much!)
(19:28 - 22:11) How James has responded to different communications surrounding Megan’s needs
(22:13 - 27:15) How we’ve kept the erotic intimacy alive after becoming parents. Hint: intimacy doesn’t always involve sex
(27:16 - 32:46) The physical challenges we faced postpartum. Intimacy, sex, and body confidence
(32:48 - 42:37) Sharing our juiciest, most stubborn fights - and how we moved through them by choosing love again and again
(42:39 - 55:55) Analyzing the moments where we’ve failed to disagree in a healthy way, but have always gotten back on track
(55:58 - 1:02:59) Tools like “Emptying the Bucket” on how to move through disagreements and regulate yourself in heated moments.
We’re hosting a couples’ retreat in February! Learn more here:
https://integratedintimacy.co/retreat/
Private 2 on 2 couple’s coaching:
https://integratedintimacy.co/couples-intensive/
Get in Touch with James, Megan, and Aimee:
https://www.instagram.com/megandlambert/
https://www.instagram.com/james.mattingley/
https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/
Aimee’s Desire on Fire Website: